Ok, I have an answer!!
At certain points in my code values that were being put into certain columns were set to null. I didn't expect this to be a problem, but it appears that if you set these values to null very bad things happen internally that cause the grid to get very slow. I went back through and set every value to string.empty where I was previously setting null and wham-o the flygrid is blazingly fast again.
I'm suspecting that somewhere internally the developers are not expect the values in the grid to be null so when .ToString is getting called on the cell's value an expection is thrown that I cannot touch. This is just a guess though, hope you guys can duplicate this problem on your end. I'll keep a watch in case anymore feedback is required.
Thanks,
Corey